Just for Fun: Tech. Support Funnies

Tech support: Click on the ‘my computer’ icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?

===============

Tech support: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello… I can’t print.
Tech support: Would you click on “start” for me and…
Customer: Listen pal; don’t start getting technical on me! I’m not Bill Gates.

===============

Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can’t print. Every time I try, it says ‘Can’t find printer’. I’ve even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can’t find it…

===============

Customer: I have problems printing in red…
Tech support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah………………..thank you.

===============

Tech support: What’s on your monitor now, ma’am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.

===============

Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support: Are you sure it’s plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can’t get behind the computer.
Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back
Customer:! OK
Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there’s another one here. Ah…that one does work…

===============

Tech support: Your password is the small letter “a” as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?

== =============

Customer: can’t get on the Internet.
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I’m sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.

===============

Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Tech support: That’s not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry…Internet Explorer.

===============

Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.

===============

Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I’m writing my first e-mail.
Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter ‘a’ in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?

===============

A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
Tech support: Are you running it under windows?
Customer: “No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine.”

===============

And last but not least…

Tech support: “Okay Bob, let’s press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter “P” to bring up the Program Manager”
Customer: I don’t have a P.
Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean?
Tech support: “P”…..on your keyboard, Bob.

March 15, 2010   Posted in: Comics  Comments

Kesha – Dancing With Tears In My Eyes Lyrics

Here we go, welcome to my funeral
Without you, I don’t even have a pulse
All alone, it’s dark and cold
With every move I die

Here I go, this is my confessional, no
Lost cause, nobody can save my soul
I am so delusional
With every move I die

I have destroyed our love, it’s gone
Payback is sick, it’s all my fault

I’m dancing with tears in my eyes
Just fighting to get through the night
I’m losing it …losing it, losing it…
With every move I die

I’m faded, I’m broken inside
I’ve wasted, the love of my life
I’m losing it …losing it, losing it…
With every move I die

When did I become such a hypocrite?
Double life, lies that you caught me in
Trust me, I’m paying for it
With every move I die

On the floor, I’m just a zombie
Who I am is not who I want to be
I’m such a tragedy
With every move I die

I have destroyed our love, it’s gone
Payback is sick, it’s all my fault

I’m dancing with tears in my eyes
Just fighting to get through the night
I’m losing it …losing it, losing it…
With every move I die

I’m faded, I’m broken inside
I’ve wasted, the love of my life
I’m losing it …losing it, losing it…
With every move I die

Ohh, this is it, Now your really gone this time
Ohh, never once thought I’d be in pieces left behind

I’m dancing with tears in my eyes
Just fighting to get through the night
I’m losing it …losing it, losing it…
With every move I die

I’m faded, I’m broken inside
I’ve wasted, the love of my life
I’m losing it …losing it, losing it…
With every move I die

February 26, 2010  Tags:   Posted in: Lyrics  Comments

Kaun Hoon Mein Lyrics – Atif Aslam – Prince (2010)

Aa aaa aah
Anjani si khwaish hai anjana hai afsana…afsana…
Na meri koi manzil hai na koi hai tikana…

wo
Anjani si khwaish hai anjana hai afsana
Na meri koi manzil hai na koi hai tikana

Aa aaa aah yeh aaa aah

Kaun hoon mein kis ki mujhe talash….Aa aaa aah
kaun hoon mein kis ki mujhe talash……..
In suni suni tanha raaho par

Behke behke say pal chin hai hosh mei b madhhoshi hai
mujhko sunayi dethe hai ye kaisi khamoshi hai…
Behke behke say pal chin hai hosh mei b madhhoshi hai
mujhko sunayi dethe hai ye kaisi khamoshi hai…
Aa aaa aah yeh aaa aah

Kaun hoon mein kis ki mujhe talash..Aa aaa aah
kaun hoon mein kis ki mujhe talash
In suni suni tanha raaho par

Koi bhi to janay na aalam meri tanhai ka
peecha kartha rehtha hu mei tho apni parchayi ka
Koi bhi to janay na aalam meri tanhai ka
peecha kartha rehtha hu mei tho apni parchayi ka

Kaun hoon mein kis ki mujhe talash……..Aa aaa aah
kaun hoon mein kis ki mujhe talash
In suni suni tanha raaho par

For any changes or suggestions to improve, e-mail / add me at yuvasweb@gmail.com

February 21, 2010  Tags: ,   Posted in: Lyrics  Comments